Thursday, April 05, 2007


I'm not a person who likes to have everyone into my personal life. So I really hate it when you have to work with certain people who think it is their life's mission to ferret out every last iota of information about you.

There are three people at work who constantly pester me about any and everything I do like they are the Brady police or something, and to make it worse I've never actually introduced myself to them. We have to have these stupid name tags at work on our desk and since my name is set up in lights for everyone to see they all think that they know me or something.

The other day a woman who sits next to me sneezed, and one of these pests asks to my back; "You got the bug or is it just allergies?" (She does not have a hillbilly accent but her grammar makes you imagine it anyway.)

So I sit there in silence, my back to her, hoping a miracle will happen and she will get a clue that it wasn't me who sneezed, but after about 20 seconds of uncomfortable silence, in which I can feel the laser light of her eye-beams drilling into the back of my skull, I turn my head and say to her.

"Who are you talking to?"

"You." The pest says.

"It wasn't me who sneezed." I say.

"Oh ."

By this point the lady who sneezed breaks in and starts laughing and everyone is happy as a clam about everything except me. So I grumble and go back to working.

First of all I don't know this pest, I don't want to know her, and just because we sit in the same area of work doesn't mean we have to become friends in the mutual admiration society. I go to work to make money, not make friends, especially with people who are always prying into my business.

And if it had been me who sneezed what business of hers is it anyway?

And third, if we have not been introduced do not use my name like you know me. I hate when people use my name all the time like it brings us closer together or something. If you use my name without an introduction, trust me it does the exact opposite of building a relationship.

And fourth, take a hint. If I don't ask about how you are doing and try to pry my nose under your covers to see what makes you tick, what makes you think I want you to do that to me?

Let's just sit in anonymity and do our job and go home. Is that too much to ask?


Anonymous said...

I bet she thinks you are hot!!!!!

Anonymous said...

Ah to have a job where all you had to do was sit in a cubicle, talk on the phone and go home at the end of the day, what a dream. i guess I have never worked anywhere that you didn't have to communicate with your coworkers in order to perform your job.

a.k.a. Brady said...

I think I detect a fellow nosy busy body. Oh and a chicken to boot! Afraid that someone might find out who you are if you leave a name? See you are enjoying anonymity. The anonymity of the internet.

Communication is different than having to know everything about your coworkers. What does knowing why or if someone is sneezing have to do with any job unless you work at the CDC?

Knowing whether your coworker is or isn't married, likes to do bondage or has a fetish for easy cheese has no bearing on working together at a job.

I did not say anywhere that you could not talk about the work at hand. But there is absolutely no reason why you need to know what I am doing on the weekend. It's my business, not yours.

And before someone points out the irony of writing a blog to the world, if I choose to tell you something, it is different than if you try to pry it out. And if you can't understand that, then there is no hope for you.